2011 Week 7 Picks

The Eagles are on bye this week, but with the Cowboys coming up on Sunday Night Football next week, they better not be resting on their laurels - or anything else - after the hopefully season-saving win over the Redskins last week. The defense still needs work, the offense still needs to learn how to score points in more than two quarters per game, and I won't feel fully comfortable about special teams until Alex Henery kicks at least one game winner from 40+. Short version: there's a lot of work to be done.

Anyway, other teams are still playing this week, and here's who I think is going to win:

Chargers at Jets: I know the Chargers have had trouble coming east historically and the weather's starting to turn chilly and all that, but they're a MUCH better team than the Jets, at least so far this year. This game shouldn't be a problem for them. Chargers.

Seahawks at Browns: Don't let that win over the Giants fool you - the Seahawks are still not very good. The Browns aren't great, either, but I think they'll get this one by virtue of home field.

Falcons at Lions: Lions. Yep, you read that right. Have I mentioned lately that I'm totally on their bandwagon? Hell, at this point, I'm riding shotgun.

Bears v. Buccaneers: I think these London games are idiotic. There's this thing? Called TV? And people in the UK have it, too? So if they're really interested in American football, they can, you know, WATCH it? Without sending teams the whole way across the Atlantic. Oy. Also, Bucs.

Broncos at Dolphins: aka, Bad at Worse. Avert your eyes. Dolphins. Which, if I'm right, will put the Colts up (down?) by one game in the "Suck for Luck" sweepstakes.

Redskins at Panthers: Regardless of which QB starts for the Redskins, this should be a blow out in their favor. Notice I said "should be." If it's not, forget calling for Rex Grossman's head - Redskins fans will be calling for Shanny's head. Which is exactly what's going to happen. Panthers.

Texans at Titans: Texans. Another bandwagon where I'm riding shotgun.

Steelers at Cardinals: Will Kevin Kolb ever pull it together? Well, not this week. Steelers.

Chiefs at Raiders: Even without Jason Campbell, I think the Raiders will be able to stretch the Al Davis Memorial Winning Streak to 3. Hope Carson Palmer's happy now. At least he gets his first start with his new team facing an opponent many college and even some high school teams could probably whup.

Packers at Vikings: Man, the Vikes just cannot catch a break. Oh right, they play in the NFC North. Sorry Christian Ponder, but your first pro start is going to be a disaster. Hand off to Adrian Peterson and hold on to your knickers. Packers.

Rams at Cowboys:  Even if Tony Romo melts down again and/or Jason Garrett doesn't trust him to do anything right, it shouldn't matter. The Rams are a hot mess, and there's enough film on AJ Feeley that they won't even get the "surprise QB" bump some teams occasionally get to enjoy. Cowboys.

Colts at Saints: Coach Payton should be back on the sideline (or at least the press box) in his cast/brace, but it won't matter - even I could coach the Saints to a win over the Colts at this point. Saints.

Ravens at Jaguars: I don't read The Onion much anymore, but I do follow them on Twitter. They tweeted something really funny recently to the effect that the sole message on the Jags fan board was from this guy looking for directions to the stadium. That pretty much sums it up. Ravens.

Joining the Eagles on bye: 49ers, Bengals, Bills, Giants, Patriots

Also, this is the ONLY place to get my picks this week. Some commenters on my syndication sites were kind of being jerks, and I do this for fun, so if it's not fun...well, you do the math. You guys, my loyal readers, are special. XOXOX.

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Sunday Schedule: Sunday, October 23, 2011

We're closed again this week, because we're taking advantage of the bye week to do a long-delayed Food Lab. We'll return next week for the big Eagles/Cowboys matchup on Sunday Night Football on October 30 (costumes encouraged).

In the meantime, here's what we'll be watching while we're labbing:

1 pm: Redskins at Panthers

4 pm: Rams at Cowboys

(Both games are likely to be blowouts in favor of the NFC East team, but gotta keep an eye on the division regardless.)

SNF: Colts at Saints (hm - or maybe we'll just watch Boardwalk Empire in real time)

MNF: Ravens at Jaguars (seriously, even in the offseason, who thought that would be an interesting game?)

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2011 Week 6 Recap

Eagles at Redskins, Sunday, October 16, 2011

In attendance: Shoegal, Chef Spouse - small group, thank goodness, since we didn't get home from a week in Seattle until after 10 pm Saturday night

Menu: 'cue from Inspire. Sadly, it was not. Inspired. Also sadly, the really good 'cue place in our neighborhood, Kenny's, isn't open on Sundays. And Steelers Transplant still lives in Tampa, which means we don't get his amazing 'cue either. No 'cue - what's a gal to do?

Stud of the week: Kurt Coleman, I'm looking at you! Kurt had a huge day, particularly given the fact that he wasn't even a starter until, I think, this week, replacing the truly awful Jarrad Page. Kurt hauled in three of Sexy Rexy's four picks, batted down some additional passes, and was in on about a million tackles. Way to ensure that starting position STAYS yours. Gotta give a shout-out to Brent Celek, too. Nice circus catch, buddy.

First, I have to get one thing off my chest:

WHY CAN'T THE EAGLES PLAY FOUR FREAKIN' QUARTERS OF COMPLETE FOOTBALL ON BOTH SIDES OF THE BALL?

Sigh.

A win's a win, and the Eagles desperately needed this one, but the fact that the offense scored all their points before the half and almost let the Redskins and their backup (new starting?) QB John Beck back in does not make me happy.

You know how, for the past four weeks, it's felt like the Eagles couldn't catch a break no matter what? Every batted pass resulted in a pick, guys who normally protect the rock gave it up, if the first level of the D missed a tackle there was NO ONE to clean it up, even the kicker was missing short field goals?

I guess someone paid a curandera to come smudge the locker room with sage or something, because damn, did the team's luck turn.

Of course, it also helped that Rex Grossman remembered that he's, well, Rex Grossman. You aren't going to turn the ball over that much and still win. Trust me - after the last four weeks, I know. Oh God, do I know.

Other things that helped:

The defense showed up ready to ball. I called the Skins to win this game in part because I wasn't seeing much in the way of results from all the defensive tweaking. I figured the team needed the two weeks of the upcoming bye in order to, oh, I don't know, scrap the entire defensive coaching staff and scheme and start over. Silly me. I still don't think Juan Castillo is going to work out long term as the DC, but at least the players seem to have remembered how to tackle and get to the ball and stop drives in the red zone and get the hell off the field on 3rd down. Maybe they were all threatened with being traded to the Rams. Whatever it was, it worked.

Shady McCoy had another huge game. Mike Shanahan's right: he IS the best back in the NFL.

Brent Celek remembered how to play football (see above).

Jeremy Maclin and Jason Avant remembered how to HOLD ON TO THE BALL.

To quote Bleeding Green Nation, Nnamdi Asomugha channeled Sheldon Brown, laid the wood we're used to seeing from a midnight green #24, and broke Chris Cooley's hand in the process. Not that I'm ever happy about injuries, but Cooley does run his mouth. A lot. A LOT.

The coaches actually planned the game relatively well. Yes, we all know Andy Reid is addicted to the big play. But this week, he must've been wearing some kind of patch or chewing some special gum, because he and Marty dialed up running plays and short drops with quick passes to keep Mike Vick from getting killed. And thank goodness, because Vince Young did not impress with his two plays from scrimmage.  (Oh, and by the way? Andy was right to challenge that spot at the end of the game, and the zebras were BLIND in calling Shady short. BLIND.) And they didn't get cute in the red zone, and look what happened: two TDs and two field goals.

Mike Vick didn't have a huge day, and you know what? That's fine by me. Last year's MNF show aside, if he throws for a jillion yards, it generally means that the Eagles are in BIG trouble.

A lot of the DC sports press today has been all about, "if only a few plays had gone the other way..." Yeah, tell me about it. In case you haven't noticed, the Eagles weren't blown out once in those four losses. So I feel you, Redskins fans, I do, but I'm glad YOU'RE the ones wailing about "if only!" this Monday.

In the end, the guys finally played like they cared. And, at least yesterday, that was enough.

Around the rest of the NFL...

Falcons over Panthers: Did you see Cam Newton bust out the Deion Sanders TD dance? Funny stuff. What's not funny is being 1-5 (so glad the Eagles are not in that camp today).

Bengals over Colts: How many ways are there to say, "The Colts suck without Peyton Manning"? Because I'd got 11 more weeks to go and I'm already running low on alternatives.

49ers over the Lions: OK, the Lions are for real, as I've been pointing out for the last five weeks. Apparently, the 49ers are, too. I've heard the 49ers are also really, really grateful for David Akers. You're welcome, and you can send the gifts of high-end small batch and single barrel bourbons to me. I'll be sure Howie Roseman gets them, I swear. Also, throw down between the coaches? LOVE!

Packers over Rams: Well, sure. Sam Bradford is hurt and AJ Feeley's their new starting QB. Spags, Feeley - it's like old home week.

Giants over Bills: Really, Bills? Really? After last week, you couldn't take care of the Giants for us? Thanks for nothing. My only hope is that none of the NFC East teams can play at all consistently this year, and the Giants ALWAYS fall apart in December.

Steelers over Jaguars: I'm pretty sure the Steelers should be really worried that they only beat the Jags by 4. They should also be really worried that Troy Polamalu might have a concussion.

Ravens over Texans: The Ravens are also for real. You know, just in case you weren't sure.

Raiders over Browns: Poor Jason Campbell just can't catch a break. He finally gets a little stability and starts winning some games, and the next thing you know: broken collarbone, Heal up quick, Jason. The West is wide open. Also, nice win on the day the team was honoring Al Davis. Who was a nut job, make no mistake, but also highly influential, both for the Raiders and the entire NFL.

Patriots over Cowboys: Pop quiz: you give the ball back to Tom Brady, Pats down by 3, with just over two minutes left. What do YOU think is going to happen, dumb ass? Sloppy game on both sides, but how does that game turn out any other way than it did? Seriously?

Buccaneers over Saints: The worst injury of the day was to Sean Payton, who took a major hit to the knee from one of his own players on the sidelines and couldn't even finish coaching the game (I think he had surgery today). Well, that and the injury to the Saints' pride in losing to the Bucs.

Bears over Vikings: First of all, say it with me, "Do NOT kick to Devin Hester. EVER." Jeez, people, get with the program! And McNabb got benched for Christian Ponder. Given the fact that his receivers dropped EVERYTHING, including passes that hit them between the numbers and on the hands, and the fact that the Vikings' O-line is TERRIBLE, I don't think that ass-whuppin' was Big 5's fault. I also think this might be the end of the line for him. NFL Network calling?

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2011 Week 6 Picks

This week, our beleaguered Eagles travel to DC to take on the NFC East leading Redskins. Back in August, who would've thought I'd be writing that sentence in mid-October? So far this season, it's been like Bizarro NFC East, with the Eagles front office behaving like Dan Snyder and Vinny Cerrato in days of yore, and the Redskins plugging away and winning games. LOLskins, indeed.

You know what the Skins are really good at this year? Running the ball. You know what the Eagles couldn't do if you paid them? Stop the run. No really - these guys are well-paid, and look what's happened in the first five games. You know what it takes to stop the run? Solid linebackers and defensive players who can tackle. So our boys in green are 0 for 2 there.

The Philly news media and my fellow bloggers have been all about "this is a MUST-WIN game!" this week.

Yeah, so was last week's game against the Bills. And so was the Eagles week three home opener against the 49ers. And the week two matchup against the Giants.

The team needs to make MAJOR adjustments. Maybe to coaching, maybe to personnel, either who they have or where they're playing them (or both), and certainly to their approach to practicing and preparing for games and to playcalling. So, you know, everything. I don't see that happening until the bye week which, mercifully, is next week. Hopefully the team won't have given up by then, because they're going to go into it 1-5.

Redskins (God help me).

In the rest of the matchups:

Panthers at Falcons: The Panthers are on the rise and the Falcons have lost their 14-2 magic, but they are still damn hard to beat at home, and I don't see them letting a divisional game slip away, particularly with one of the NFC wildcard spots virtually guaranteed to the North at this point. Falcons.

Colts at Bengals: Adam Schefter started a tweet storm with his bit on SportsCenter this morning about what he would recommend - if anyone was asking - in the way of hypothetical, proposed trades. The next thing you know, someone tweeted "Dawkins being traded to Philly" as fact, and we were off to the races. But Schefter did have one thing right - the Colts should just trade everyone they can to get as many draft picks next year as possible to go with their new QB, Andrew Luck, and their new head coach, Peyton Manning. Bengals.

49ers at Lions: If you're not an NFC East fan, this is the game to watch in the 1 pm time slot. Both teams are way outperforming expectations this year. With the Lions, it's been building. Looking at what's been going on with that team in the past few years, anyone with half a brain in her head could see they were on the cusp of something great. This is the year it all starts coming together for them. In the meantime, you may remember the 2005 draft, when Aaron Rodgers was taken in the first round, but not until pick 24. Remember who was drafted #1? Yep, Alex Smith. For the past six years, he's looked like a HUGE bust. Then a little thing happened I like to call "Competent Coaching." Jim Harbaugh is having a tremendous effect on that entire football team, not least their QB. I give the edge to the Lions because I feel like their climb from the cellar of the NFL is on a stronger footing, because they're at home, and because their division is much tougher. Also, Team of Destiny! Lions.

Rams at Packers: There's at least one game per season where I advise one of the teams to forfeit. This would be that game. Just forfeit, Rams, and save yourselves the shame of being the first team in NFL history to lose by three digits. Packers, with the gimme pick.

Bills at Giants: I was reading Big Blue View and the Giants fans seem, to me, to be irrationally optimistic about their ability to handle the hot Bills. Face it guys: the NFC East is just not very good this year, and these Bills are not your daddy's Bills. Bills.

Jaguars at Steelers: You know what other long-tenured head coach's days are looking numbered? Jack Del Rio. Steelers.

Texans at Ravens: This is a tough one to call. Both teams have posted BIG wins over the Steelers. I know the Texans are dealing with some injuries at this point, and I know the Ravens are playing at home, but I have to go with my recently graduated Team of Destiny. Texans.

Browns at Raiders: Look for the Raiders to extend their Al Davis Memorial Winning Streak to two this week.

Cowboys at Pats: Even if Tony Romo doesn't completely melt down at some point during the game - which is starting to look like a weekly occurrence - there is NO WAY the Cowboys win this game. Yeah, I know the Pats have, statistically, the worst defense in the entire league. I also know that the Cowboys will NOT be able to keep up on offense. No way. Pats. Yes, that means three NFC East teams will lose this week. Told you we aren't very good this year.

Saints at Buccaneers: The Bucs seem to be regressing, which is too bad, because they were showing some promise. Back to blacked out games, Tampa. Saints.

Vikings at Bears: The Bears o-line is putrid this year, which just might be enough to keep the Vikings in this game. But I still think Lovie's team will walk away with a W, as long as Jared Allen doesn't completely flatten Jay Cutler. And even that might not be enough.

Dolphins at Jets: Finally, the Jets are facing an opponent they can DEFINITELY beat in the 0-4 Dolphins. At least they better, or Rex's head might literally explode on the sidelines. Jets.

On bye: Broncos, Cardinals, Chargers, Chiefs, Seahawks, Titans

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Sunday Schedule: Sunday, October 16, 2011

Chef Spouse and I will finally be home to watch the games this weekend! However, we do need a solid headcount for Sunday because we will just be getting home from Seattle, so if you're planning to come, we need to know by text, email, or call NO LATER than Saturday, October 15.

On to the schedule:

1 pm: Eagles/Redskins (of course) - second game will be Bills/Giants

4 pm: Pats/Cowboys - second game either Texans/Ravens or Saints/Bucs (we'll take a vote)

SNF: Bears/Vikings (aka, "Everyone gets to go to bed early!")

MNF: Dolphins/Jets (aka, "Everyone gets to go to bed early again!")

Menu: since we'll have just gotten home, we're going to get some kind of takeout. Chef Spouse is thinking that we'll try Inspire BBQ, which recently opened in our neighborhood and is supposed to be quite good. And unlike all the OTHER BBQ joints in our 'hood, it's actually open on Sundays.

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2011 Week 5 Recap

Eagles at Bills, Sunday, October 9, 2011 

In attendance: just me and Chef Spouse. I'm on a business trip in Seattle, and his dad lives out here, so he came with.

Menu: room service

Stud of the Week: there isn't one. Seriously. No one.

The DirectTV Sunday Ticket To Go was experiencing some significant buffering issues during the game today. It could've been the fact that I was on hotel wireless. But I prefer to think that DirectTV was trying to protect me from witnessing what Bleeding Green Nation referred to as the "vortex of errors and futility that has ensnared the Eagles." 

If you had put some money on the Bills being 4-1 and the Eagles being 1-4 in week 5 a month ago, you'd probably be able to afford some REALLY good booze to help you dull the pain right now.

Those few seconds of hope I enjoyed when it looked like they might just pull off the comeback win were fun. I enjoyed them. They might be the last I get this season.

What else is there to write about this team? Can't tackle? Check. Like, epically, historically bad at tackling? Check. Offensive turnovers at critical times? Check. Dumb penalties that extend opponents' drives? Check. Lack of defensive take-aways? Check. Doing nothing with whatever takeaways they do get? Check. Ineffective in the red zone on both sides of the ball? Check. Inexplicable coaching decisions? Check, check, check.

"Why wasn't Mike Vick the stud? After all, he broke Randal Scramble's all time QB rushing record today." Well, sure - and he threw four picks (although they weren't all his fault). And let's not forget the brain fart at the end of the half that cost the Eagles three points.

"What about Jason Avant? He had a career day!" Yep, and two critical turnovers. Hands Avant had TWO turnovers. And both at the worst possible times.

Fellow Eagles Maniac and I were Facebooking during the game. I suggested it might be time to sacrifice a goat. She feels like the goat we should start with is Juan Castillo.

How can this team find so MANY different ways to lose?

In the battle between five hundred total yards of offense and five turnovers, five turnovers will always win out. Well, lose. You know what I mean.

I really don't know where the guys go from here. I'm pretty sure Juan Castillo has to go. If not now, then during the bye week. Actually, if the Eagles drop next week's game to the Redskins (which I fully expect them to do), Andy Reid might not have a job after the bye week.

It used to be that, when the Eagles needed someone to step up, he did. Whether it was a big defensive stop, or a takeaway, or a pick-6, or a 14 second McNabb scramble, or Brian Westbrook turning a sure tackle for a loss into a 40 yard gain, or even Freddie f-ing Mitchell catching a 4th and 26, somebody would always step up. Not anymore.

The Eagles have plenty of guys with great fantasy stats. What they don't have is a team. And I don't know how they fix that.

Around the rest of the NFL...

Saints over Panthers: But just barely and on a last-minute (literally in the final minute) TD. The Panthers are going to be really good in another year or two.

Raiders over Texans: If I had known Al Davis was going to up and die, I would've called this game differently. Hey, you think if someone whacks Jeff Lurie, the Eagles might win another game this season?

Chiefs over Colts: I called it! Also, at least there's one team that's worse off than the Eagles!  For the moment!

Bengals over Jaguars: I really need to actually WATCH a Bengals game at some point to check out young Mr.Dalton.

Vikings over Cardinals: Looks like the Vikings have finally figured out how to win games. Hand off to Adrian Peterson. And it took them FIVE WEEKS to remember that?

Seahawks over Giants: You know that thing I said above about how you can't win games if you keep giving the ball away to the other team? Yeah, that. And the Seahawks even lost Tavaris Jackson.

Steelers over Titans: Just when you think the Titans are getting good, they screw up. Just when you think the Steelers are dead, they spring back to life. I should've remembered both of these things in calling this game.

49ers over Bucs: HOLY CRAP. 48-3. And the Bucs are a pretty decent team this year. Frank Gore's clearly back, and maybe, just maybe, Alex Smith is actually turning into a QB.

Chargers over Broncos: Beginning of the Tebow era? Probably. He didn't win, but he did play well, in sharp contrast to Kyle Orton, and he's fun as hell to watch.

Pats over Jets: Their record is better, but the Jets are almost as big a disappointment this year as the Eagles. Almost.

Packers over Falcons: It was all (or nearly all) Falcons in the first half, but you just can't keep the Packers down. Damn, they look good.

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Sunday Schedule, Sunday, October 9, 2011

Another game, another weekend when we're out of town. Yep, we're closed again - in Seattle for work.

Good games to watch this week include:

1 pm - well, I'll be watching Eagles/Bills, thanks to Sunday Ticket To-Go, but I think Raiders/Texans will be a much better game

4 pm - I'll be working. You should catch Jets/Pats

Back next week!

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