2012 Week 7 Picks

All I have to say at this point is: "Thank GOD for the bye week." ONE Sunday where I will not:

• Have a coronary 
• Give myself a rage headache 
• Yell at the TV for 3 solid hours
• Have to watch any games through my coat sleeve (Life-Long Eagles Fan Mom knows what I'm talking about)
• Scare my cat and/or Chef Spouse out of the room
• Drink myself into a state of not caring anymore
• Exhaust my full vocabulary of English swear words and have to start looking up new ones on the Internet
• Have to leave the house for several hours to calm down

So Juan Castillo's out and Todd Bowles is in. Feels to me like Big Red is panicking. Jeff Lurie as much as told him and everyone else "It's playoffs (and I don't mean one win, buster) or hit the pavement" this year, and it seems like Andy's taking him seriously. Thing is, firing Castillo feels a little bit like scapegoating. Sure, he was in over his head from the start, and we're all STILL scratching our heads about why Andy ever thought it would work. But, aside from blowing one lead late in the game (because, come on, I cannot bring myself to blame the defense for not being able to hold a ONE POINT lead against the Steelers at Heinz Field for nearly 7 minutes), and the much-discussed poor sack production, the defense has not been a huge problem. Usually, when a team is winning by 3 or fewer points (hello, 2012 Eagles season thus far), the defense gets praised.

To me, the MUCH bigger problems are Marty Mornhinweg and Bobby April. Shady gets 20+ touches = win. Shady gets less than 20 touches = loss. This is not complicated math. And how is it that the Eagles are ranked 27th in scoring with players like DeSean Jackson, Jeremy Maclin, LeSean McCoy, Mike Vick, and Brent Celek?And special teams has been a disaster so far this year. A DISASTER.

But Juan was vulnerable. So out he goes. We'll see what happens against Atlanta on October 28. It will certainly be a test of the defense, with the Falcons in the top 5 in scoring. And if it doesn't go well, we all (and in "we all" I include the Eagles players and coaching staff) have to wonder: who's next. Shit. I'm already giving myself a rage headache, and the game is 11 days off.

What? You wanted me to pick the games this week? Oh, all right:

Seahawks at 49ers: Well, after last week, I think I have a new rule: never pick against the Seahawks at home. But they're not AT home this week, are they? The two teams are surprisingly evenly matched (with the Niners with an edge in offense), but the 49ers are not going to drop two in a row at home. 49ers.

Titans at Bills: Both teams are coming off upset wins, so either (or both) could be in for a let down game. But I'm going with homefield and the Bills.

Cowboys at Panthers: The Cowboys should be able to right the ship - at least for one week - against the struggling Panthers. If they don't, I think Jason Garrett gets sacked. Hey, Jerry's fired head coaches during the season before...Cowboys.

Ravens at Texans: Last week aside, and it's a big aside, 'cause they got whupped, I gotta go with the Texans.

Browns at Colts: And the Browns winning streak ends at 1. Colts. Also Joe Banner has his work cut out for him.

Cardinals at Vikings: This should be a good game. Words I never would have written two months ago. I've got the Vikings.

Redskins at Giants: Really want to pick the Redskins, not least of which to keep the Giants from extending their lead over the Eagles. (Apparently, I still have hope. Pity me.) But I just don't see it. Giants.

Packers at Rams: Two months ago, I would've figured the Packers would dismantle the Rams, homefield or no homefield. Now? I've got the Rams.

Saints at Buccaneers: The Saints. I think. Fingers crossed.

Jets at Patriots: The Jets are dead men. Patriots.

Jaguars at Raiders: Raiders. The Jags are having yet another bad season.

Steelers at Bengals: The Steelers haven't won on the road yet this season. That should end this week. Steelers.

Lions at Bears: Upset pick. Lions.

On bye: The Eagles, thank God, and the Broncos, Chargers, Chiefs (who are DEAD to me), Dolphins, and Falcons.

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2011 Week 7 Recap

Mini-recaps this week, since I was busy cooking and didn't follow the games too closely.

Panthers over Redskins: The deal with Mike Shanahan is supposed to be that he has this system, and as long as you follow The System, the particular players don't really matter. After all, he's won all those Super Bowls, right? So he must know? I'm just spit balling here, but I'm thinking that John Elway had something to do with it. Just theorizing, but maybe they won all those Super Bowls BECAUSE of John Elway and IN SPITE OF the Shanahan system. And John Beck is no John Elway.

Browns over Seahawks: SNOOZE. 6-3, and that was with two field goals blocked. You-Two-Calm-Down-or-I'm-Turning-Off-the-TV Dad has a tradition of taking a Sunday afternoon nap, and I'm betting that even the people who were AT THE STADIUM were asleep by the second half.

Falcons over Lions: Oh Lions, don't crap out on me already! It's not even November! At least Stafford is still vertical. Sort of.

Broncos over Dolphins: Giving up 15 points in about two minutes? The Fins deserved to lose. I'd guess that Tony Sparano would be fired during the bye week, but that ship has already sailed this season for the Fins. Has a head coach ever been fired without benefit of a bye week to bring someone else in? We could see history this year.

Jets over Chargers: Another end of game collapse! And I thought for sure the Chargers would get over the East Coast thing this week. Also, the Jets still have (at least) nine games to go this season. Little tip from me to their opponents? Double Plax in the end zone. Long time Eagles fan here. Trust me on this one.

Bears over Bucs: Just when I start thinking the Buccaneers might be getting something going (see last week and the win over the Saints), they blow it. This is what parity looks like.

Texans over Titans: So, apparently, Arian Foster's feeling a little better. You know, just a little. To the tune of 234 yards. Yowza.

Steelers over Cardinals: Duh.

Chiefs over Raiders: Last night on Football Night in America, Tony Dungy and Rodney Harrison were debating who there is to like in the AFC West. They couldn't figure it out, and neither can I. The Chargers fall apart to the Jets. The Raiders stink it up against the Chiefs. Who are now 3-3. Kyle Boller and Carson Palmer were Bad and Worse. Broncos? Yeah, not Broncos. What a mess. Who knew Jason Campbell was so critical?

Cowboys over Rams: Again with the duh.

Packers over Vikings: The only surprise was that the game was as close as it was. Guess the Pack can't totally dominate every single team every single week. I'm smelling a repeat.

Saints over Colts: Speaking of total domination...Chef Spouse has recently been making the argument that Peyton Manning should win MVP again this year. If we're judging by the player whose team can't live without him, Chef Spouse has a point. Boardwalk Empire was really great last night, by the way. The first season was a little slow - they were clearly setting up characters and story lines - but this season has been outstanding. I really love the Richard Harrow character and hope that something nice happens for him. I also love Margaret Schroeder. I think if Nucky can just see it, she could be a tremendous genuine partner for him. Why I am writing about this? Because I quit watching at halftime in favor of Boardwalk Empire. It was that pathetic. I seriously don't know why Jim Caldwell still has a job.

Oh - and Food Lab: Corn Tortillas was great. You can check the blog later this evening to read all about it.

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2011 Week 7 Picks

The Eagles are on bye this week, but with the Cowboys coming up on Sunday Night Football next week, they better not be resting on their laurels - or anything else - after the hopefully season-saving win over the Redskins last week. The defense still needs work, the offense still needs to learn how to score points in more than two quarters per game, and I won't feel fully comfortable about special teams until Alex Henery kicks at least one game winner from 40+. Short version: there's a lot of work to be done.

Anyway, other teams are still playing this week, and here's who I think is going to win:

Chargers at Jets: I know the Chargers have had trouble coming east historically and the weather's starting to turn chilly and all that, but they're a MUCH better team than the Jets, at least so far this year. This game shouldn't be a problem for them. Chargers.

Seahawks at Browns: Don't let that win over the Giants fool you - the Seahawks are still not very good. The Browns aren't great, either, but I think they'll get this one by virtue of home field.

Falcons at Lions: Lions. Yep, you read that right. Have I mentioned lately that I'm totally on their bandwagon? Hell, at this point, I'm riding shotgun.

Bears v. Buccaneers: I think these London games are idiotic. There's this thing? Called TV? And people in the UK have it, too? So if they're really interested in American football, they can, you know, WATCH it? Without sending teams the whole way across the Atlantic. Oy. Also, Bucs.

Broncos at Dolphins: aka, Bad at Worse. Avert your eyes. Dolphins. Which, if I'm right, will put the Colts up (down?) by one game in the "Suck for Luck" sweepstakes.

Redskins at Panthers: Regardless of which QB starts for the Redskins, this should be a blow out in their favor. Notice I said "should be." If it's not, forget calling for Rex Grossman's head - Redskins fans will be calling for Shanny's head. Which is exactly what's going to happen. Panthers.

Texans at Titans: Texans. Another bandwagon where I'm riding shotgun.

Steelers at Cardinals: Will Kevin Kolb ever pull it together? Well, not this week. Steelers.

Chiefs at Raiders: Even without Jason Campbell, I think the Raiders will be able to stretch the Al Davis Memorial Winning Streak to 3. Hope Carson Palmer's happy now. At least he gets his first start with his new team facing an opponent many college and even some high school teams could probably whup.

Packers at Vikings: Man, the Vikes just cannot catch a break. Oh right, they play in the NFC North. Sorry Christian Ponder, but your first pro start is going to be a disaster. Hand off to Adrian Peterson and hold on to your knickers. Packers.

Rams at Cowboys:  Even if Tony Romo melts down again and/or Jason Garrett doesn't trust him to do anything right, it shouldn't matter. The Rams are a hot mess, and there's enough film on AJ Feeley that they won't even get the "surprise QB" bump some teams occasionally get to enjoy. Cowboys.

Colts at Saints: Coach Payton should be back on the sideline (or at least the press box) in his cast/brace, but it won't matter - even I could coach the Saints to a win over the Colts at this point. Saints.

Ravens at Jaguars: I don't read The Onion much anymore, but I do follow them on Twitter. They tweeted something really funny recently to the effect that the sole message on the Jags fan board was from this guy looking for directions to the stadium. That pretty much sums it up. Ravens.

Joining the Eagles on bye: 49ers, Bengals, Bills, Giants, Patriots

Also, this is the ONLY place to get my picks this week. Some commenters on my syndication sites were kind of being jerks, and I do this for fun, so if it's not fun...well, you do the math. You guys, my loyal readers, are special. XOXOX.

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Sunday Schedule: Sunday, October 23, 2011

We're closed again this week, because we're taking advantage of the bye week to do a long-delayed Food Lab. We'll return next week for the big Eagles/Cowboys matchup on Sunday Night Football on October 30 (costumes encouraged).

In the meantime, here's what we'll be watching while we're labbing:

1 pm: Redskins at Panthers

4 pm: Rams at Cowboys

(Both games are likely to be blowouts in favor of the NFC East team, but gotta keep an eye on the division regardless.)

SNF: Colts at Saints (hm - or maybe we'll just watch Boardwalk Empire in real time)

MNF: Ravens at Jaguars (seriously, even in the offseason, who thought that would be an interesting game?)

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2010 Week 8 Recap

Eagles bye week, Sunday, October 31, 2010 


In attendance: just me and Chef Spouse. And NINE MILLION trick-or-treaters. Seriously, I've never seen so many in my life. We gave away every bit of candy we had the in house before 9 pm, at which point it became "turn out the lights and hide" versus "start handing out potatoes." We opted for #1.

Menu: shrimp etouffee and absinthe frappes. Since we couldn't be in NOLA for the weekend, we decided to pretend we were.

Stud of the week: my system for my picks. With the MNF Texans/Colts matchup in progress, I'm 11 for 12 on the week. No, I did not use a Magic 8 Ball. I was going to tell you how I did it, but Chef Spouse said I should preserve the mystery. So you'll just have to marvel.

In other news, it was the week of 2 points:  safeties, made two point conversion attempts, missed two point conversion attempts, you name it. If it was possible to get 2 points in there some way, teams did it. Even when it made no sense, like early in the 3rd quarter.

On to the results:

49ers over Broncos: I called it. Also, I think Mike Singletary still thinks his 2-6 team is going to the Super Bowl, God love him.

Jaguars over Cowboys: I called it. So one of the questions of the week is will there be a coaching change in Dallas? Amazingly, enough other wackadoo stuff has happened that it's barely in the top 5 though. The thing about switching coaches DURING the season is that it's a pretty dicey proposition - if the Cowboys were going to do it, they should've done it a month ago, before their bye week. I think they're pretty much stuck with Wade for the rest of the season, although I'd be shocked if he's still coaching in 2011. I've heard Cowher and Gruden both floated as possible replacements, but I don't think either of them is dumb enough to want to work for Jerry Jones. Also, Gruden gets credit as a coach he doesn't deserve - he won the Super Bowl with Tony Dungy's team. And Cowher has repeatedly said he doesn't want to leave North Carolina until his kids are grown, which to me indicates that his only possible coaching destination, at least for a while, would be the Panthers. Anyway, moving on...

Dolphins over Bengals: I called it. But TO got two TDs, so he may not even be aware the Bengals lost.
 
Chiefs over Bills: I called it. Won in OT on a field goal that literally went through the uprights as time expired, the Chiefs leave the Eagles still holding the dubious distinction of the last tie.

Lions over Redskins: I called it. I don't know what reality Mike Shanahan lives in where Rex Grossman is a better option than Donovan McNabb to run the two minute offense down by 5. Even weirder? Now Shanny's changed his tune to "McNabb's too fat to run the two minute offense." RIIIIIIIGHT. All I can think is that he's thinking, "Well, after McNabb got benched against the Ravens in 2008, he played like a house afire for the rest of the season, taking the Eagles to another NFC Championship game that they only lost because them damn defense fell apart." Can I point on that on his VERY FIRST play from scrimmage, Sexy Rexy got sacked, coughed up the ball, and the Lions put the game away? And this is supposed to be coaching genius?

Rams over Panthers: I called it. The Panthers stink this year. Hmmm, about Bill Cowher....

Packers over Jets: This is the one I missed, although in my defense, I did say that according to my system, it was a push. I went with the home team. Oops. Who would've guessed it would be the PACK who pitched a shut out?

Chargers over Titans: I called it, even though I could hardly believe it. The Chargers are probably gearing up to pull their annual, "You gave us up for dead. But wait! We're not! We're resurrecting your hopes! Until the playoffs. Then we really are dead."

Patriots over Vikings: I called it. You did hear that Randy Moss got released today? Dude hadn't even had time to get his cable hooked up yet! His post-game press conference love-fest for the Pats sure didn't help things, particularly after he decided that he was going to WATCH the passes, but he sure as hell wasn't planning to CATCH them, but something more must've happened. Personally? I think it's some sort of Belichick plot, and somehow Randy Moss will end up back in New England after stiffing the Vikings for a few mil. What do you have against Minnesota, Bill?

Bucs over Cardinals: I called it. The Bucs are quietly sitting at 5-2. Did you know?

Raiders over Seahawks: I called it. Looks who learned how to win games! Speculation is rampant, in the wake of The Benching, that McNabb will be somewhere not DC next year. Oakland's been floated as a possibility. Think that would make Jason Campbell go postal?

Saints over Steelers: Another one I called. Believe in the system. Trust the system. Love the system. What system? Can't tell you. But let's see how I fare this coming week....

(Also, at the moment, the Colts are up 14-0.)

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2010 Week 8 Picks

It's the BYE week edition, and frankly, not a moment too soon.

It seems like every year I write a post about how everyone on the team is on "no Madden/Gameboy/World of Warcraft" punishment because the Eagles always seem to slump before the bye.

So am I crazy? Over-reacting? Guilty of false memory syndrome?

Um, no.

Andy loses games the week before the bye. He's at .500. Which wouldn't be so odd if it weren't for the fact that he's .620 overall in his coaching career with the Eagles. He really does lose disproportionately prior to the bye, no matter when it lands.

On the other hand,  the week AFTER the bye?  Big Red is perfect, which will really be put to the test this year, with the Colts on tap and possibly no DeSean Jackson.  Get healthy, guys.

Anyway, on to the picks:

Broncos at 49ers: 49ers. I've got a system this week.  I'll tell you what it is if it works.

Jaguars at Cowboys: Jags. ("Oh no, she din't!" "Oh yes, I did!")  Guess that whole "they'll win the NFC East" prediction is pretty much right out the window. Also, this pick goes against the system. But I still think I'm right.

Bills at Chiefs:  Chiefs.

Panthers at Rams: Rams.

Redskins at Lions: Lions. (Ouch. I so want to be on Team Donovan.)

Dolphins at Bengals: Fins.

Packers at Jets: Jets. According to my system, this one's a push, though.

Titans at Chargers: Chargers. That's what the system says.  (There may be a flaw in the system.)

Buccaneers at Cardinals: Bucs.

Vikings at Patriots: Favre? Jackson? Some dark horse candidate? Doesn't matter - the Pats are going to win this one regardless. Pats. (Which is also breaking the system.)

Seahawks at Raiders: Can the Raiders duplicate their trouncing of the Broncos last week? Probably not, but I don't know that it will matter. They won't need 59 points to beat the Seahawks. Raiders.

Steelers at Saints: Saints. Hey, that's what the system predicts! Also, I think they will rebound this week.

Texans at Colts: Colts. Damn, Former Team of Destiny. This just ain't your week.

On bye: Eagles, Giants, Falcons, Ravens, Bears, Browns (big group this week)

Photo credit: Ben Kepple (but you already guessed that)

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Sunday Schedule: Sunday, October 31, 2010

Bye week, and it's just in time. Mike Vick can't get back under center fast enough. But we'll still be watching football, y'all.

1 pm: Redskins at Lions (secondary game Jags at Cowboys)
4 pm: Vikings at Patriots (open to requests on the secondary game)
SNF: Steelers at Saints (who better pull their heads out of their asses, or this is going to get ugly)
MNF: Texans at Colts

Menu: well, it's Halloween, so Chef Spouse plans to make some "eerie" drinks. Not sure what all that's going to involve, but it should be interesting. Menu? So far it's a surprise - Chef Spouse is feeling undecided. I'll post an update when he makes up his mind.

Also, come in costume if you can, since you'll be helping hand out candy once it gets dark. And because it's fun.

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2009 Week 4 Recap

Bye Week, Sunday, October 4, 2009

In attendance: Just me & Chef Spouse, thank the Flying Spaghetti Monster. I got home from a 4 day conference in Orlando mid-afternoon Saturday and was in need of a little downtime.

Menu: Chef Spouse's super-yummy cream of tomato soup with grilled cheese sandwiches. Yum!

Stud of the Week: DirecTV's Supercast, hands down. Sunday was killing me - Pats/Ravens playing opposite Bucs/Redskins AND Saints/Jets playing opposite Broncos/Cowboys. Short of running back and forth between the kitchen and the living room, what's a football fan to do? Chef Spouse's big brain to the rescue. "Wait! Grab one of the laptops!" Within minutes, TWO games on at once IN THE SAME ROOM. Did you hear that singing? It's the football angels. I'm usually the farthest one can possibly get from being a corporate shill, but that seriously made my whole damn day.

In Eagles news, we managed to avoid the cavalcade of injuries that hit the NFC East yesterday by conveniently not playing. Good move, team! We have enough injured players, thank you very much. And with the Axeman back, it's like old home week. Who's next? Hugh Douglas? Wolverine will decide he's sick of the thin air in Denver and come on back? Jaws decides to drop the microphone and suit up?

In other news, it's great that the NFL strongly supports Breast Cancer Awareness month. Really - there are lots of of female football fans, and the males all at least have a mother, if not sisters, wife, girlfriend, cousins, nieces, daughters, etc. What's not great? Pink gloves and/or shoes with red uniforms. Purple? Sure. Green? Yeah, but not Jets green. Blue? Fo' shizzle. Orange? HELL NO.

OK, enough foreplay - on to the games.

Skins over Bucs. The Skins did EVERYTHING they could to hand that game over. Jason Campbell had an 18 QB rating in the first half. 18! It was painful to watch. And yet, they won. Conclusion? Yes, the Bucs really are *that* bad. Dear Josh Johnson: look down at your chest. Is it covered in a midnight green jersey with a big #5 in the middle? No? They don't expect to scramble around for 8-10 seconds and then make something happen, with your arm OR your legs. If you ain't McNabb, it ain't happening, son. Edited to add: the Bucs have fired placekicker Mike Nugent. Not surprising given the fact that he couldn't find the middle of the uprights with graph paper, a protractor, and his high school geometry teacher. Not that a few field goals would have helped against the Giants, but it made the difference Sunday.

Pats over Ravens. OK, am I the ONLY ONE who noticed that the officiating was TERRIBLE in that game? Look, if you want the Pats to win so bad that you're willing to call roughing the passer on any defender in the same ZIP code as Rocks Brady, you really need to quit being a zebra and run a Tom Brady fan club full time. Meanwhile, the refs were too busy passing Rocks mash notes to actually call anything on that Pats. Meanwhile? Coming after DMac? Chainsaws are allowed (on even-numbered weekends). By the way, Trent Dilfer is freaking out on this topic on Monday Night Countdown as I type this. You know what's common in all the roughing calls? White QB. You know what's common in all the calls that weren't made and should have been? Black QB. I'm just sayin'.

Bears over Lions. Do *either* of those teams have any defense at all? Has the NFC North become the "no D" zone? 48-24? And all the Lions games have been like that so far. Unfortunately, the Lions may have lost their rookie QB to a knee injury. OK, maybe NEXT year is the year they get it together.

Bengals over Browns. It took them all but 4 seconds of the ENTIRE overtime to do it, but the Bengals are 3-1, kids. Yep, leading the tough AFC North with the Ravens. Hm - that whole tie thing? Maybe it's the Bengals....

Texans over Raiders. Well, yes. Good teams beat teams they're supposed to beat. Average teams beat teams that really suck (see below: Redskins over Rams). Did you hear? Texans are showing signs of H1N1. That's not good.

Colts over Seahawks. Is anyone else worried about the fact that Peyton Manning just plays on, no matter what? No Tony Dungy - no problem. No Marvin Harrison - no problem. Is he actually the Terminator?

Jaguars over Titans. Man. The Titans were a sexy pick for AFC South this year. Not for me - I picked the Texans. Because I'm crazy like that. But still. 0-4 is not good. Ouch.

Giants over Chiefs. Um, yeah. But they only beat them by 11 points. Slackers. Also, they're reporting that Eli Manning's heel problem is plantar fasciitis. I've had that, and it hurts like a mo-fo. And can take MONTHS to go away (particularly if you're still active). Good news for us!

Dolphins over Bills. Just when I give up on the Dolphins, they win a game. What's the over/under on TO throwing Trent Edwards under the bus?

Saints over Jets. Drew Brees had a relatively bad day, and the Saints made Mark Sanchez look like the rookie he is anyway. Call me crazy, but I see another post-season Eagles/Saints matchup in this year's NFC Championship game. You know how I was all "the Ravens have O - be afraid." Well, the Saints have D, so you know what to do. Duck & cover.

Broncos over Cowboys. Kyle Orton did everything he could to lose that game, and Champ Bailey and Wolverine were all, "No way, man." And thank you for that. It wasn't pretty, but it was a win. And Tonyboy had another bad game, which always makes me happy, because it's bad for his fragile ego. Edited to add: Wilbon's column this morning reminded me of something I should have mentioned - THE play of the game was Brandon Marshall's sweet go-ahead touchdown, where he smoked about 1/2 the Cowboys defenders, slipped about a dozen tackles, and found the end zone. Wanna watch it again? Me, too.



Wilbon also wondered why Romo chose to throw at Champ Bailey so much. I don't think Romo *wanted* to throw at Champ. I think his thought process went something like: "Hmmm - where to put the ball? Option A: throw towards Champ. Damn, he's be to, like, 9.7 million Pro Bowls. That's not good. Option B: Shit! Is that Brian Dawkins?!? When did he become a Bronco? I'm still having nightmares about him from the last game of the 2008 season. And the last game of the 2006 season. Is he stalking me? Isn't that illegal? Champ it is."

49ers over Rams. On Football Night in America, Keith Olbermann was all: Spags is like, "Is there a spot on your coaching staff?" to Mike Singletary. HEE! Also, true. Poor Spags. The Rams are epically bad. Hey, they lost to the Redskins.

Steelers over Chargers. So the Steelers problem this year has been blowing 4th quarter leads. And they went into the half at 21-0. And the Chargers had a terrible first possession after the half. And the Steelers scored again, going to 28-0. And Chef Spouse and I went up to bed, thinking the game was O-V-E-R. And the Chargers brought it back to 38-28. The Steelers are not getting past the Ravens (who should have won their game with the Pats this week had everyone not been too busy kissing Tom Brady's ass) this year.

Final thought: Go Pack! Edited to add: the Pack, sadly, did not go. Their main issue seems to be that their QB has trouble completing passes from a sitting position. I know they've had some injuries, but their O line is REALLY bad. Y'all need to give that boy some protection, or he'll be on IR by week 8! And even with that, they ALMOST pulled it off. Damn. Another week (or maybe season) of "That Brett Favre. Isn't he DREAMY?" from all the commentators.

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2009 Week 4 Picks

NEVER have I been so glad to see an early bye week. Lots of guys need to get healthy, starting with Big 5...Westy...Peanut...Kevin Curtis...Celek (how could he not need a week off after the pounding he took against the Chiefs?). And did you see the Axeman is back? Dude, he's almost as old as I am. Hope his bionic knee holds up better than Westy's new ankle.

So, on to the picks (which are going to be brief this week, because I'm at a conference):

Lions/Bears: I'm pulling for the Lions to extend their streak to 2! Go Lions! (it's pretty unlikely, but I need an upset pick, right?)

Bengals/Browns: One of these teams is looking like they might not be too bad this year, and it's not the Browns. Bengals.

Raiders/Texans: The Raiders have the beginnings of a team if they could just fix their QB. The Texans have the beginnings of a team if they just had some defense. Fortunately, lack of defense won't be a problem this week. Texans.

Seahawks/Colts: Colts. Anyone who will wear lime green jerseys doesn't deserve to win.

Titans/Jaguars: There's NO way the Titans go to 0-4, right? Right? Titans.

Giants/Chiefs: Chiefs. SIKE! Giants.

Ravens/Patriots: Ravens. Patriots, your time at the top of the AFC has come to an end.

Buccaneers/Redskins: The Redskins will continue their new tradition of handing teams their first win. Bucs.

Bills/Dolphins: Bills will get to .500 against a Pennington-less Dolphins.

Jets/Saints: Damn, should this be a good game. Can anyone shut down the Saints blisteringly hot offense? The #3 ranked Jets defense stands the best chance of any of their opponents so far, but the thing is, the Saints D ranks a lot higher than the Jets O. To me, that says Saints, baby!

Cowboys/Broncos: Wolverine has had some of his best games in recent years picking off Tony Romo. I don't see that changing this week. Broncos.

Rams/49ers: Even without Frank Gore, the 49ers should walk all over the Rams.

Chargers/Steelers: C'mon Steelers! Pull yourselves out of your early season slump! Steelers.

Packers/Vikings: Oh man, do I want the Pack to win this week! I might have to borrow Ex-Navy Cheesehead's cheesehead to wear for the Monday night game. Bring it, Packers!

Other teams watching from the couch in the man cave this weekend: Cards, Falcons, Panthers

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Sunday Schedule: October 4, 2009

Never thought I'd be so happy to see an early bye week! Man, could we use it to help Big 5, Westy, Peanut, Kevin Curtis and I don't even know who all else get healthy!

Anyway, we'll still be watching the football Chez Snark, regardless...

1 pm: Likely Redskins/Buccaneers, but we'll also be keeping an eye on Giants/Chiefs (which will probably be a blow out)

4 pm: Cowboys/Broncos, but we'll also be keeping an eye on Jets/Saints

8 pm: Chargers/Steelers - should be a good game!

MNF: Packers/Vikings - should be another good game!

Menu: Chef Spouse is thinking grilled cheese & cream of tomato soup, because he's mostly been working from home the past few weeks and wants the soup for lunch! Bring something that will go with!

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