2012 Week 7 Picks

All I have to say at this point is: "Thank GOD for the bye week." ONE Sunday where I will not:

• Have a coronary 
• Give myself a rage headache 
• Yell at the TV for 3 solid hours
• Have to watch any games through my coat sleeve (Life-Long Eagles Fan Mom knows what I'm talking about)
• Scare my cat and/or Chef Spouse out of the room
• Drink myself into a state of not caring anymore
• Exhaust my full vocabulary of English swear words and have to start looking up new ones on the Internet
• Have to leave the house for several hours to calm down

So Juan Castillo's out and Todd Bowles is in. Feels to me like Big Red is panicking. Jeff Lurie as much as told him and everyone else "It's playoffs (and I don't mean one win, buster) or hit the pavement" this year, and it seems like Andy's taking him seriously. Thing is, firing Castillo feels a little bit like scapegoating. Sure, he was in over his head from the start, and we're all STILL scratching our heads about why Andy ever thought it would work. But, aside from blowing one lead late in the game (because, come on, I cannot bring myself to blame the defense for not being able to hold a ONE POINT lead against the Steelers at Heinz Field for nearly 7 minutes), and the much-discussed poor sack production, the defense has not been a huge problem. Usually, when a team is winning by 3 or fewer points (hello, 2012 Eagles season thus far), the defense gets praised.

To me, the MUCH bigger problems are Marty Mornhinweg and Bobby April. Shady gets 20+ touches = win. Shady gets less than 20 touches = loss. This is not complicated math. And how is it that the Eagles are ranked 27th in scoring with players like DeSean Jackson, Jeremy Maclin, LeSean McCoy, Mike Vick, and Brent Celek?And special teams has been a disaster so far this year. A DISASTER.

But Juan was vulnerable. So out he goes. We'll see what happens against Atlanta on October 28. It will certainly be a test of the defense, with the Falcons in the top 5 in scoring. And if it doesn't go well, we all (and in "we all" I include the Eagles players and coaching staff) have to wonder: who's next. Shit. I'm already giving myself a rage headache, and the game is 11 days off.

What? You wanted me to pick the games this week? Oh, all right:

Seahawks at 49ers: Well, after last week, I think I have a new rule: never pick against the Seahawks at home. But they're not AT home this week, are they? The two teams are surprisingly evenly matched (with the Niners with an edge in offense), but the 49ers are not going to drop two in a row at home. 49ers.

Titans at Bills: Both teams are coming off upset wins, so either (or both) could be in for a let down game. But I'm going with homefield and the Bills.

Cowboys at Panthers: The Cowboys should be able to right the ship - at least for one week - against the struggling Panthers. If they don't, I think Jason Garrett gets sacked. Hey, Jerry's fired head coaches during the season before...Cowboys.

Ravens at Texans: Last week aside, and it's a big aside, 'cause they got whupped, I gotta go with the Texans.

Browns at Colts: And the Browns winning streak ends at 1. Colts. Also Joe Banner has his work cut out for him.

Cardinals at Vikings: This should be a good game. Words I never would have written two months ago. I've got the Vikings.

Redskins at Giants: Really want to pick the Redskins, not least of which to keep the Giants from extending their lead over the Eagles. (Apparently, I still have hope. Pity me.) But I just don't see it. Giants.

Packers at Rams: Two months ago, I would've figured the Packers would dismantle the Rams, homefield or no homefield. Now? I've got the Rams.

Saints at Buccaneers: The Saints. I think. Fingers crossed.

Jets at Patriots: The Jets are dead men. Patriots.

Jaguars at Raiders: Raiders. The Jags are having yet another bad season.

Steelers at Bengals: The Steelers haven't won on the road yet this season. That should end this week. Steelers.

Lions at Bears: Upset pick. Lions.

On bye: The Eagles, thank God, and the Broncos, Chargers, Chiefs (who are DEAD to me), Dolphins, and Falcons.

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2011 Week 7 Recap

Mini-recaps this week, since I was busy cooking and didn't follow the games too closely.

Panthers over Redskins: The deal with Mike Shanahan is supposed to be that he has this system, and as long as you follow The System, the particular players don't really matter. After all, he's won all those Super Bowls, right? So he must know? I'm just spit balling here, but I'm thinking that John Elway had something to do with it. Just theorizing, but maybe they won all those Super Bowls BECAUSE of John Elway and IN SPITE OF the Shanahan system. And John Beck is no John Elway.

Browns over Seahawks: SNOOZE. 6-3, and that was with two field goals blocked. You-Two-Calm-Down-or-I'm-Turning-Off-the-TV Dad has a tradition of taking a Sunday afternoon nap, and I'm betting that even the people who were AT THE STADIUM were asleep by the second half.

Falcons over Lions: Oh Lions, don't crap out on me already! It's not even November! At least Stafford is still vertical. Sort of.

Broncos over Dolphins: Giving up 15 points in about two minutes? The Fins deserved to lose. I'd guess that Tony Sparano would be fired during the bye week, but that ship has already sailed this season for the Fins. Has a head coach ever been fired without benefit of a bye week to bring someone else in? We could see history this year.

Jets over Chargers: Another end of game collapse! And I thought for sure the Chargers would get over the East Coast thing this week. Also, the Jets still have (at least) nine games to go this season. Little tip from me to their opponents? Double Plax in the end zone. Long time Eagles fan here. Trust me on this one.

Bears over Bucs: Just when I start thinking the Buccaneers might be getting something going (see last week and the win over the Saints), they blow it. This is what parity looks like.

Texans over Titans: So, apparently, Arian Foster's feeling a little better. You know, just a little. To the tune of 234 yards. Yowza.

Steelers over Cardinals: Duh.

Chiefs over Raiders: Last night on Football Night in America, Tony Dungy and Rodney Harrison were debating who there is to like in the AFC West. They couldn't figure it out, and neither can I. The Chargers fall apart to the Jets. The Raiders stink it up against the Chiefs. Who are now 3-3. Kyle Boller and Carson Palmer were Bad and Worse. Broncos? Yeah, not Broncos. What a mess. Who knew Jason Campbell was so critical?

Cowboys over Rams: Again with the duh.

Packers over Vikings: The only surprise was that the game was as close as it was. Guess the Pack can't totally dominate every single team every single week. I'm smelling a repeat.

Saints over Colts: Speaking of total domination...Chef Spouse has recently been making the argument that Peyton Manning should win MVP again this year. If we're judging by the player whose team can't live without him, Chef Spouse has a point. Boardwalk Empire was really great last night, by the way. The first season was a little slow - they were clearly setting up characters and story lines - but this season has been outstanding. I really love the Richard Harrow character and hope that something nice happens for him. I also love Margaret Schroeder. I think if Nucky can just see it, she could be a tremendous genuine partner for him. Why I am writing about this? Because I quit watching at halftime in favor of Boardwalk Empire. It was that pathetic. I seriously don't know why Jim Caldwell still has a job.

Oh - and Food Lab: Corn Tortillas was great. You can check the blog later this evening to read all about it.

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2011 Week 7 Picks

The Eagles are on bye this week, but with the Cowboys coming up on Sunday Night Football next week, they better not be resting on their laurels - or anything else - after the hopefully season-saving win over the Redskins last week. The defense still needs work, the offense still needs to learn how to score points in more than two quarters per game, and I won't feel fully comfortable about special teams until Alex Henery kicks at least one game winner from 40+. Short version: there's a lot of work to be done.

Anyway, other teams are still playing this week, and here's who I think is going to win:

Chargers at Jets: I know the Chargers have had trouble coming east historically and the weather's starting to turn chilly and all that, but they're a MUCH better team than the Jets, at least so far this year. This game shouldn't be a problem for them. Chargers.

Seahawks at Browns: Don't let that win over the Giants fool you - the Seahawks are still not very good. The Browns aren't great, either, but I think they'll get this one by virtue of home field.

Falcons at Lions: Lions. Yep, you read that right. Have I mentioned lately that I'm totally on their bandwagon? Hell, at this point, I'm riding shotgun.

Bears v. Buccaneers: I think these London games are idiotic. There's this thing? Called TV? And people in the UK have it, too? So if they're really interested in American football, they can, you know, WATCH it? Without sending teams the whole way across the Atlantic. Oy. Also, Bucs.

Broncos at Dolphins: aka, Bad at Worse. Avert your eyes. Dolphins. Which, if I'm right, will put the Colts up (down?) by one game in the "Suck for Luck" sweepstakes.

Redskins at Panthers: Regardless of which QB starts for the Redskins, this should be a blow out in their favor. Notice I said "should be." If it's not, forget calling for Rex Grossman's head - Redskins fans will be calling for Shanny's head. Which is exactly what's going to happen. Panthers.

Texans at Titans: Texans. Another bandwagon where I'm riding shotgun.

Steelers at Cardinals: Will Kevin Kolb ever pull it together? Well, not this week. Steelers.

Chiefs at Raiders: Even without Jason Campbell, I think the Raiders will be able to stretch the Al Davis Memorial Winning Streak to 3. Hope Carson Palmer's happy now. At least he gets his first start with his new team facing an opponent many college and even some high school teams could probably whup.

Packers at Vikings: Man, the Vikes just cannot catch a break. Oh right, they play in the NFC North. Sorry Christian Ponder, but your first pro start is going to be a disaster. Hand off to Adrian Peterson and hold on to your knickers. Packers.

Rams at Cowboys:  Even if Tony Romo melts down again and/or Jason Garrett doesn't trust him to do anything right, it shouldn't matter. The Rams are a hot mess, and there's enough film on AJ Feeley that they won't even get the "surprise QB" bump some teams occasionally get to enjoy. Cowboys.

Colts at Saints: Coach Payton should be back on the sideline (or at least the press box) in his cast/brace, but it won't matter - even I could coach the Saints to a win over the Colts at this point. Saints.

Ravens at Jaguars: I don't read The Onion much anymore, but I do follow them on Twitter. They tweeted something really funny recently to the effect that the sole message on the Jags fan board was from this guy looking for directions to the stadium. That pretty much sums it up. Ravens.

Joining the Eagles on bye: 49ers, Bengals, Bills, Giants, Patriots

Also, this is the ONLY place to get my picks this week. Some commenters on my syndication sites were kind of being jerks, and I do this for fun, so if it's not fun...well, you do the math. You guys, my loyal readers, are special. XOXOX.

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Sunday Schedule: Sunday, October 23, 2011

We're closed again this week, because we're taking advantage of the bye week to do a long-delayed Food Lab. We'll return next week for the big Eagles/Cowboys matchup on Sunday Night Football on October 30 (costumes encouraged).

In the meantime, here's what we'll be watching while we're labbing:

1 pm: Redskins at Panthers

4 pm: Rams at Cowboys

(Both games are likely to be blowouts in favor of the NFC East team, but gotta keep an eye on the division regardless.)

SNF: Colts at Saints (hm - or maybe we'll just watch Boardwalk Empire in real time)

MNF: Ravens at Jaguars (seriously, even in the offseason, who thought that would be an interesting game?)

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2010 Week 7 Recap

Eagles at Titans, Sunday, October 24, 2010

In attendance: Chef Spouse, Fellow Eagles Maniac and her friend The Bronx Bomber

Menu: burgers with a variety of fun toppings (caramelized onions, sauteed mushrooms, bacon, a variety of cheeses), fries (good but not great - I think I need to get Chef Spouse a deep fryer), AWESOME pumpkin cheesecake (homemade by Fellow Eagles Maniac), guacamole, and copious amounts of alcohol, at least in the 4th quarter.

Stud of the week: Riley Cooper, who fended off a sure pick with an acrobatic catch and, shortly thereafter, scored his first TD as a pro player.  Chad Hall's a close #2. He battled hard for every yard he got, even though he's shorter than the grass.

Well, the thing about wins is they're fun to watch. The thing about losses are that they can be fun to write about. You know, because of the ranting. What ranting? Oh, just you wait.

Kevin Kolb: could you please stop keying on ONE receiver? You're telegraphing what you're going to do so clearly Martians are picking it up. Also, OK it was windy - you're a PRO FOOTBALL QB. Your arm should be able to overpower some wind.

Didn't the Eagles used to have a tight end named Brent Celek? Who was pretty good? I know McNabb loved him some tight ends and maybe K2 doesn't as much, but come on! Does he even play for us anymore?

Did anyone notice that the Eagles may have some O-line problems? Don't tell me you weren't shitting yourself when King Dunlap went down. And King Dunlap's center of gravity is so high he gets pushed around by everyone. But he's better than nothing, and "nothing" is just about what the Eagles are down to at this point.

But all that is secondary to the secondary, aka Hobbs and Allen. They couldn't cover anything except maybe their eyes, which is what I was doing all during the fourth quarter, while Kenny Britt was burning the Eagles' asses. In case you haven't already read it on the millions of other blog posts so far, 225 yards is the most EVER by ANY receiver in 77 years of Eagles football.

And it never occurred to Sean McDermott to move Asante Samuel over? Or tie Britt's shoelaces together? Or turn Trent Cole loose on him and take up a collection to cover the fine? (Yes, I know Trent Cole is a defensive end whose job it to go after the QB. But desperate times call for desperate measures people!)

And who knew that that ridiculous handoff fumble in the 3rd quarter was the voice of doom? But it was - the Eagles couldn't do a single thing right after that, giving up 27 points in the 4th quarter alone. The whole team deserves a "C'mon man!" shout-out.

C'mon man!

Around the rest of the NFL:

Falcons over Bengals: Roddy White had a big day, and the Falcons almost managed to give away the game anyway. But only the Eagles can squander a lead THAT big.

Steelers over Dolphins: OK, the Dolphins totally should have won this. That Roethlisberger fumble? The Fins came up with it, and the zebras screwed it up. Then again, the officiating has generally been terrible this year. Rules too complicated? Maybe.

Ravens over Bills: How did the Bills manage to get so close? How did they manage to put up 34 points on the Ravens? Apparently, that hasn't happened in Harbaugh's entire tenure as head coach. I'm guessing the rest of the AFC North is going to be watching this game tape closely.

Chiefs over Jaguars: The Chiefs are the real thing, I am buying, and they're going to win the AFC West this year.

Browns over Saints: What the hell happened? Apparently, Drew Brees has a new #1 receiver, only it's David Bowens, and he plays for the Browns. Former Saint Scott Fujita and former Eagle Sheldon Brown both contributed to the mayhem.

Redskins over Bears: Yes, I know everyone has already made this joke. Jay Cutler's found his #1 receiver, too - too bad it's DeAngelo Hall. That was one sloppy game - it was impossible to keep up with the turnovers, and we were using a 19" screen for this as the second game. Wasn't big enough.

Panthers over 49ers: Stick a fork in the 49ers. They're done.

Buccaneers over Rams: Hm - interesting. Apparently, Josh Freeman is money with the 4th quarter comebacks.

Seahawks over Cardinals: Amazing what losing a potential HOF QB can do to a team. Even if they do still have my secret wide receiver boyfriend Larry Fitzgerald. Have you seen his ass? Seriously.

Patriots over Chargers: Why was this game even close? The Chargers are a wreck this year.

Raiders over Broncos: Somebody should've invoked the mercy rule. Oh wait - there is no mercy rule. Someone should institute a mercy rule. Most points ever by the Raiders. And an ugly, ugly performance by the Broncos. When the other team scored 24 points in the first quarter, you're pretty much done.

Packers over Vikings: Another sloppy game, but the Packers pulled it out, thanks in part to 3 Favre picks in the second half. High risk, high reward? Well, more like you know he'll throw as many picks as TDs.

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2010 Week 7 Picks

Eagles at Titans:  I'm torn this week. On the one hand, you can't stop Chris Johnson - you can only hope to contain him. And the Eagles are not brilliant against the run. Also Mike Vick is likely still out, even though he returned to practice today. On the other hand (is that too many hands?), K2 did great last week against a Falcons team that EVERYONE expected to win. On the other hand, DeSean Jackson's likely out for awhile, too. Of course, so is Vince Young. And while he's not an amazing quarterback, he's better than Kerry Collins by a long shot.

Of course, I keep picking against the Eagles - and they keep winning. Chef Spouse says I'm overly superstitious, but...

And 4-2 in AFC South is different than 4-2 in NFC East, at least this year.

Everybody's picking the Titans. Then again, everybody picked the Falcons last week.

But I think they're right this week - Titans.  Or maybe I'm just superstitious.

In the rest of the matchups:

Bengals at Falcons: Falcons. Things are not well in Cincinnati.

Jaguars at Chiefs: Chiefs. The Jags got spanked on Monday and lost their quarterback in the process. Not good.

49ers at Panthers: 49ers. I still believe in Mike Singletary.

Browns at Saints: Seriously? This isn't even fair. Saints. Also, ouch.

Bills at Ravens: Also ouch. Ravens.
 
Rams at Buccaneers: This is an interesting matchup. Both teams are performing better than expected this year. People are mostly calling Bucs, but I'm going with Rams - just a hunch.

Redskins at Bears: Donovan tends to play well in his hometown of Chicago, and Jay Cutler's getting smacked around the way Jason Campbell did last year. Actually, come to think of it, so's Donovan. But he pops up like a Weeble, as long as it's not November. And it's not. Redskins.

Steelers at Dolphins: Can I pick a 3-2 team over a 4-1 team? Yep.  Dolphins.

Cardinals at Seahawks: Tough call. Seahawks I think. But this one's really a push.

Raiders at Broncos: The Broncos are scoring an ass-load of points. I don't think the Raiders can keep up. Broncos.

Patriots at Chargers: Patriots. The Chargers are a mess.

Vikings at Packers: Packers all the way, baby! Team Rodgers!

Giants at Cowboys: I have a theory about the Giants and their slow starts - the team hates Tom Coughlin so much they're willing to throw some games at the beginning of the season in hopes that he'll literally have a stroke on the sidelines so they can get another coach. By the time they're about a month in, they're all like "Yeah, not this year. Sigh. OK, I guess we gotta play for this asshole another season. Let's pull it together." Which happened 3 weeks ago. Too bad for the Cowboys (not really)! Giants.

On bye: Lions, Texans, Colts, Jets

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Sunday Schedule: Sunday, October 24, 2010

More potential traffic glitches this week, as the annual Army 10 Miler closes roads in the DC area.  Check their website for details. Mem Bridge and one of the spans of the 14th Street bridge will be closed, as well as some streets on Capitol Hill.

On to the games:

1 pm:  Eagles at Titans (secondary game will be Redskins at Bears)

4 pm:  Patriots at Chargers

8 pm: Vikings at Packers

MNF:  Giants at Cowboys
 
Menu:  Chef Spouse is thinking burgers on the grill with homemade fries and some fancy toppings.

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2009 Week 7 Recap

Eagles at Redskins, Monday, October 26, 2009

In attendance: For MNF, me, Chef Spouse, Deadhead Redskins Fan, her friend the season ticket holder, Cool Web Dude (Skins Fan), Hottie Web Chick, and a Fed Ex field that looked about 1/2 and 1/2 to me.

Sunday football was a whole new crew - McLovin, Wingman, Mr. Wingman, and Tweety Monster (all friends from my professional me life)

Menu: Potage au pistou, a really yummy French veggie soup with white beans and pesto, lots of different cheeses and olives, rosemary bread, the infamous guac, the equally infamous garlic crack, and lots of fun cocktails - Chef Spouse was on a roll.

Stud of the Game: You know it's gotta be #10, DJax, the Dime of 5 & Dime, your favorite and mine, DeSean "Peanut" Jackson. 67 yard rushing TD, 57 yard receiving TD, 29 yard punt return. My man is bringing it in his sophomore season! Honorable mention goes to new Eagle MLB Will Witherspoon who created two turnovers last night, one that went for 6 and the other for 3. Welcome to the Eagles, Will! We're glad you're here.

So we won, which is good. And our D looked pretty solid, particularly on that goal-line stand (which was helped by Jason Campbell's fumble). And we held Clinton Portis to 43 yards on 14 attempts (he's not the threat he once was, but that's still pretty good). And our O line looked better. And when BWest went down, our offense didn't completely fall apart, as we often have in previous years.

Our offense was completely out of sorts other than the two big 5 & Dime hookups. In my totally-has-no-effect-on-anyone-who-could-make-a-difference opinion, the problem is that Andy and Marty keep screwing around with trick shit every third play. Here are other items on Andy's Chinese food menu laminated play card that he just didn't get to last night:

• Have DMac line up at tight end
• Bring Trent Cole in as a receiver
• Lineup BWest at center
• O-line and receivers switch places
• EVERYONE lines up to the left, including Stacey Andrews and Winston Justice
• Everyone moves one position to the right
  
• All 3 QBs on the field at once
• Once DMac has the ball, he fakes to the left. No! He fakes to the right. He doesn't fake. He thinks about faking. He pretends to fake. (extra points if you recognize the reference)

It's one thing if your QB is Chad Henne. But here's a thought: have you heard of this guy named Donovan McNabb? 5 time pro-bowler, as of last night, only the 21st player in NFL history to have 200 TD passes and 30,000 passing yards? One of only FOUR players to have 200 TD passes and 3,000 rushing yards? Maybe you might want to consider just LETTING HIM PLAY QB. Sorry, haters, but when he's on the field, he's our best offensive weapon. Why in the hell are we taking him out of the huddle every third play? I know Vick is Big Red's community service project, and that's lovely, but we need to win some f-ing games here! We ALL know that one of DMac's problems is that he's streaky. He can't get ON a streak if he's constantly coming off the field.

We won, but we won ugly. A fellow Eagles fan emailed me earlier today asking if the Iggles had their first quality win. I'm sure my Skins fan friends appreciate the upgrade, but the Skins are no one's definition of a quality team. We're still - STILL - looking for our first quality win. Next week would be a GREAT time for it to show up.

And in injury news, there's more bad news for the Skins. Not only do they have the third worst owner in football and a TOTALLY ineffective GM (seriously, I think I'd do a better job than Vinny Cerrato), but Chris Cooley is out, maybe for the rest of the season, with a broken ankle. He's one of their few reliable players at this point. And as for Westy, thank God it's just a concussion. Not that they aren't serious, but when he wasn't moving we were ALL freaking out. I thought it was really nice that DMac stayed with his brother Byron (who, as you may recall is a Redskin) after Andy motioned for him to stay on the field.

Are we playoff material this year? Going into the season I thought "for sure." Now, I'm not so convinced. One thing in our favor is that we do tend to get hot at the right time (November/December) - and next Sunday is Nov 1. We'll know in just under 6 days if we *are* playoff material this year.

Around the rest of the NFL...

WHAT WAS WITH ALL THE BLOWOUTS!?!? Geez - BOOOOOO-RING! Sigh.

Packers over Browns. I have no comment about this. NO ONE has a comment about this. The Packers didn't even feel like finishing the game, but they were contractually obligated.

Texans over 49ers. It was a close game. Shaun Hill's been benched. Alex Smith got to play. Good for him! After the big Alex Smith/Aaron Rodgers draft in 2005, it was like both of them died. Or went to play in the CFL. Or decided to trek in Nepal for a while. It's nice to see them both playing. Mike Singletary obviously hopes Smith will play *better* but maybe he will when he actually gets the reps with the rest of the first team offense.

Chargers over Chiefs. Which team is the biggest whipping boy so far this season? I would say the Chiefs, but they have actually won a game. Over the Redskins, true, but in the race to the bottom, they aren't leading. That dubious honor would be reserved for....

Patriots over Buccaneers. Yes, the Bucs are the worst team in football. Except for maybe...

Colts over Rams. Hm, maybe the Rams are the worst team in football. What do y'all think? In other news, the Colts have lost Adam Vinateri for 3-7 weeks and have signed Matt Stover as a replacement. Why did they bother? All Peyton does is throw TDs. A placekicker seems superfluous.

Steelers over Vikings. Now THAT's the Brett Favre I love to hate - no TDs, a pick, and a lost fumble. Let the suck begin (I hope)! And the rest of us learned a valuable lesson. Want to beat the Vikings? Shut down Adrian Peterson (only 69 yards), and make Favre do it. Because the old man CAN'T.

Bills over Panthers. Speaking of teams that suck...well, it's probably not the *whole* team. Actually, it's mostly Jake Delhomme. At least he's really fun to watch while he's losing. Once he's out of football - which at the rate he's going could be next week - he should definitely not look to get on the professional poker circuit.

Jets over Raiders. What was I smoking when I picked the Raiders to win? Must've been the same thing as Wilbon. Apparently, we're BOTH knuckleheads.

Bengals over Bears. Man, was that embarrassing. The Bengals put up 45 points on the Bears. How's that bend-don't-break D working out in Chi-town?

Cowboys over Falcons. Damn it! We had the chance to go up one game on the whole division, and the stupid Falcons couldn't pull it together for us! ARGH! It looked pretty promising for the first half, and then Tony Romo remembered that this guy named Miles Austin is supposed to be his #1 wideout and, hey, he actually played like a #1 wideout! Damn.

Saints over Dolphins. 46 to 34. That's like a high school basketball score. 80 points? BOTH teams defenses should be embarrassed.

Cardinals over Giants. I punked out and couldn't stay awake to see the end of this game and I am SO PISSED. I even said to Chef Spouse: "This is a great game, but the Giants will pull it together, and I'm beat. I'm going to bed." STUPID STUPID STUPID. And if you look at the stats, it looks like it should've been all Giants. Other than those 3 picks Eli threw. Will Witherspoon and Asante Samuel, are you paying attention? Also, I do believe that Fitz has the best butt in football. Crucial to the game? No, but nice to look at!

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2009 Week 7 Picks

Man, did we stink it up last week. Yes, I'm still on that. Does that mean that we aren't who we thought we were? Nah - just usual Eagles mid-season weirdness. They want to keep it interesting for the fans. If you recall, our Phillies had a mid-season slump too, and look how that's turning out!

Meanwhile, the Redskins have stripped head coach Jim Zorn of his playcalling duties. Zorn, as you may recall, was originally brought in to be the offensive coordinator, aka The Guy Calling The Plays. Sherm Lewis will be calling the plays now. He's had an illustrious career, but he's also been calling nothing more important than bingo games recently, and he's been in DC with the Redskins for approximately two weeks. I'd be amazed if he even knows all the players' names yet. "You! Tall skinny African-American receiver! Run a go route!"

What's really going on? I'm guessing that Snyder and Cerrato are trying to force Zorn to quit so they don't have to buy out his contract when they fire him. Because it's inevitable. As a matter of fact, I'm guessing it goes down Tuesday morning, October 27, after we humiliate the Redskins on national TV. You heard it here first.

In the rest of the matchups:

Packers/Browns - Packers. (Yes, no comment. No comment needed.)

49ers/Texans - You *know* I'm calling my Team of Destiny, the Texans!

Chargers/Chiefs - Dear Chiefs: hope you enjoyed that big one game winning streak, because it ends this weekend. Chargers.

Colts/Rams - Oh my God. Really? I know I joke about this a lot, but I'm totally serious now - the Rams should just forfeit. Even though it means they won't get paid. Trust me, no amount of money is worth what they're going to go through Sunday. None. Besides, they'll be able to to apply to FEMA for disaster relief funds. Do I even need to say "Colts"?

Pats/Buccaneers - Sigh. What is up with the games in London? This is such a dumb gimmick. And jet lag is no joke, both going and coming. Do I really have to talk about the game? The poor Bucs - they're not going to get their first win this week, either. Bucs Chick, you're definitely winning the suck fest. Patriots.

Vikings/Steelers - I'm picking against the Vikings. Again. Since I want them - or more precisely, Brett Favre - to lose, I should probably start picking for them. Yeah, not gonna happen. Steelers. (who have Troy Polamalu back, by the way)

Bills/Panthers - Both teams are bad. Both teams are *not* going to the playoffs this year. Yes, it's only week 7 but I already know. So do you. Bills. But does it really even matter?

Jets/Raiders - Raiders, if you do to Mark Sanchez what you did to DMac last week, you won't even need to score to win. Call it a Raiders win, score 2-0.

Bears/Bengals - This is an interesting matchup. Are the Bengals for real? Well, you know what happened last week. Are the Bears for real? Two words for you: Jay Cutler. Coin flip says Bengals.

Falcons/Cowboys - Falcons. You know it, baby! Cowboys continue to disappoint. YAY!

Saints/Dolphins - The Saints will see something they haven't faced so far this season - efficient wildcat. It's a different look for them. But the result will be the same - Saints win.

Cardinals/Giants - Cards, do you think you can manage to beat the Giants for us? Please? Pretty please? There are homemade cookies in it for you if you do. Not buying it? Me, either. Giants.

On Bye: Ravens, Broncos, Jags, Lions, Seahawks, Titans

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Sunday Schedule: October 25, 2009

The Iggles face the Skins on national TV on MNF this week, and Chef Spouse and I are going with Deadhead Redskins Fan and her friend, who holds the season tickets. After week 6, two things are true: the Iggles are PISSED and the Skins are imploding before our eyes. Should make for an interesting evening at FedEx Field.

Anyway, for your Sunday viewing pleasure:

1 pm - Steelers/Vikings - Go Steelers!
4 pm - Cowboys/Falcons - Go Falcons!
8 pm - Giants/Cardinals - Go Cardinals! (even though I think you're gonna lose)

Menu: It's going to be chilly and we have some yummy leftover pesto a friend brought to a recent potluck, so Chef Spouse is thinking potage au pistou (a French veggie soup with white beans and pesto), accompanied by homemade baguettes (if I can get my act together to start them Saturday) and other yummy snacks. Bring something to go with! (like maybe wine :)

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